A miscarriage offers many lessons.

When I lost a baby in May of 2015 I learned about grief, about marriage, about surrender and suffering and isolation and, in a profound way, I have learned that heaven is real and not that far away.

I also learned, through the generous sharing of many, that miscarriages are common.

In fact, I really believe that most of our lives have, in some way, been touched by miscarriage.  Perhaps you have lost babies.  Or your mother, sister, friend, co-worker.  Once we are brave enough to talk about miscarriage, the number of people still grieving the loss of these “hidden” babies is tremendous.  And this pain is real, just as the loss was real.

Because that really is the issues, isn’t it.  We feel the loss and everything seems changed…and yet we aren’t really sure how to grieve, of if we are even allowed to grieve.

Most of us don’t have a body to bury.  We never really looked pregnant and some of us never had a chance to announce the pregnancy.  And time drifts on.  So, despite our hurt and our emptiness, we aren’t really sure IF we should grieve, let alone how we should grieve.

But, as I quickly found out in this little Facebook Post, we do need to grieve and there are many, many beautiful ways to memorialize our lost little hidden babies.  Ways to remember them, ask for their intercession and keep them alive in the memories of our families.

There are several different ways to remember those lost babies.  In case you have suffered a loss and are searching for a way to memorialize that baby, here is a big list of ideas.  Pray about it and do what feels right.  And remember, there is healing and peace ahead.

30+ Ideas for Memorializing a Miscarriage

Naming

Consider naming the baby lost to miscarriage.  It might feel a little odd, especially if you don’t know the gender due to an early loss, but naming the baby will enforce for you and others (especially other children) that this was a REAL life that was lost.  Naming also allows you to bond with the baby and claim it.

Once you have a name for the baby, use that name often.  Include the baby by name when you talk about your family and when you pray for family members.

Family Culture

There are several ways to include lost babies in the culture of your family.  Including them in family prayer is important, but you can also include them in family scrapbooks.  Include ultrasound pictures or a simple symbol so that when reading through the scrapbook your family can pause and remember the moment that they joined the family.

Jewelry

There are lots beautiful ways that you can remember your lost babies through jewelry.  Here are a few:

Pins

I keep this tear drop pin on the back of my wallet in remembrance of the baby, whom we named Peter, that I lost.

Necklace

Many great options for personalized or non-personalized necklaces on Etsy.  Here are two of my favorites:

Find it HERE.

Find it HERE.

Here is another example of a necklace to remember a lost baby, which was shared on my facebook page.  The couple decided to use little pearls to represent those babies.  The mother shared, unfortunately, that she currently had send the necklace away to get another pearl, for another lost baby.

Rings

I really love this Mother’s Ring uploaded on the Facebook Thread.  The little copper heart represents a lost baby.  But I am struggling to find a link to a similar product.  So, if you know of the link, or make them yourself, please share it in the comments!

Bracelet

There are also some beautiful bracelet options on Etsy including these two:

Find it HERE

Find it HERE.

Art

Many people also shared beautiful, artistic ways that they have memorialized their lost babies.  My own mothers suffered through many miscarriages and a couple still births.  This is how she remembers her losses.

One of the most creative ways I have ever seen of remembering a lost baby is this cool heartbeat print shared in the facebook thread.  Sara, the mother that shared this image writes, “At my one of my appointments I was able to record baby’s heart beat. After I learned that we lost him, I used some software online to convert the sound of his heartbeat into an image and put it on a canvas. It hangs in our bedroom along with photos of our other children.”

I noticed that there are vendors on Etsy willing to make this print for you if you have a heartbeat recording.

A good friend of mine, Emily, remembers her baby with this shadow box which includes gifts and other mementos she received for the baby she lost.  I really love this idea because there will inevitably be little things that you don’t really know what to do with after the baby is gone and this supplies a nice place to display and see them.

Etsy also has many beautiful prints and printables to remember lost babies.

Find it HERE.

Find it HERE.

It was also a popular idea to remember babies lost to miscarriage at Christmas.  Many talked about a special ornament that they hung for that baby.  Here is a beautiful example from willow tree.

And here is a personalized option from Etsy.

Find it HERE.

And it just won’t be right if I didn’t include a little embroidery.  Love this handmade ornament from Happy Nest Home Goods.

Find it HERE.

Finally, a couple of women shared beautiful gardens and outdoor spaces that they use to remember.  Here is one example shared by a women on my Facebook page.  She has three little ones waiting for her in heaven.

Tattoo

In the Facebook Post many women shared pictures of the tattoos they have gotten to remember lost babies.  Many were big and amazing.  Here are two examples of simpler ones, that are still so meaning and beautiful.

And

Acts of Remembrance

Finally, it can be powerful to actually DO something to remember your lost babies.  Here are a few ideas also supplied by my wonderful followers over on Facebook.

Donate a toy each year for a child that is about the same age as the baby you lost.

Make a donation in the name of the child you lost.

Start a scholarship fund in the name of the baby you lost.

Plant a tree for the lost baby.

Inscribe your baby’s name in the Book of Life at the Shrine of the Holy Innocents.

Okay, dear friends, I hope this was helpful and inspiring.  If nothing else I hope you see that many women have lost babies and we all are changed because of it.  The aftermath of a miscarriage is very difficult, and all too often people don’t really understand.  You might feel very alone, and please know that you are in my prayers.

Please, consider finding a beautiful way to remember your baby.  There are so many ways to remember and it is so important that we do remember.  Because that baby, even though they are gone now, was a real life.

Blessings dear friends.  And, please, if you have any other ideas to add to this list, leave them in the comments.  I will be happy to update this post as I want it to be big helpful resource for those grieving.

Your sister on this journey,

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