Married friends. When was the last time that you did something for your marriage? Something more than a date night? Something more than holding your husband’s hand as you walked into mass? When was the last time you sat and prayerfully reflected on those beautiful promises you made to each other on your wedding day?
It’s time to tend to our marriages. Join me for a 4 week Lectio Divina based study examining Our Wedding Vows. Each week we will look closely at a part of the vows we made on our wedding days. Daily we will enter into The Word and ask God what He truly wants for us in marriage. Each week will conclude with discussion questions and a challenge, based on that week’s topic, to do with your spouse. Daily discussion, sharing and encouragement will take place in our private facebook group for all those that purchase the study.
So please, take the time, right now, for your marriage.
The study will only be on sale this week, May 15-23. On May 23rd the study starts, and I’d love for you to be part of it.
Because, whether we want to admit it or not, marriage can be a fragile thing.
It is startling when someone my age, married as long as I have, gets divorced. Startling, sad, shocking. Marriage is an institution that most clearly defines who I am. I am Bill’s wife. Together we are parents of 4 children. That is who we are. We are a ‘we’ and the idea of that ever changing is just baffling.
And yet, since I got married 6 years ago I, for the first time, was able to understand divorce.
Through the grace of God my parents are still married, as are my husband’s parents. Naively I just thought that for people like me (whatever that means), marriages didn’t end. That we all reached that ‘until death do us part’ without much effort or heartache.
And I have found out just how sorely wrong I was.
Marriage is difficult. In the early days of marriage Bill and I struggled just to live together, to divide up household tasks, to share openly, and to give up our secret selfish behaviors. Now that we have 4 young children things aren’t any easier. Together we are navigating cross-country moves, defiant toddlers, potty training, group sports, stress, sleep deprivation, and all sorts of wacky things that come with work and kids and life.
And not only is live complicated, I have to live every day, make every decision, with this other imperfect human being.
Our relationship isn’t perfect. I speak without thinking. He looses his patience. I shut down. He makes rash conclusions. I hold a grudge…
We can both be petty and selfish and sometimes, although thankfully not often, the stress leads us to say and do things we don’t mean and hurt each other in ways we had never intended.
Through our marriage we have hurt each other and left wounds. Some fights have not been easily settled and some nights have been harder than any I faced as a single person. And yet, we love each other and remain committed and deeply in love.
It was only after I was married that I realized how easy it would be to hurt my spouse. How easy it is to destroy love and trust with a few simple words, or no words at all. Marriage demands intimacy and honestly and vulnerability. Within marriage we have a unique capability of hurting or being hurt.
And this is why marriage has helped me understand divorce.
My husband and I are currently in a very good place in our marriage. He is an incredible communicator and has patiently taught me to be the same. We still disagree about a lot, but those disagreements don’t rule our lives or color our feelings toward each other. Yet, I know my marriage needs to be nourished. I know that in order to grow with my husband I need to grow with my God and enter even more deeply into the VOWS that I made on my wedding day.
So, even though life with a newborn is crazy right now, I am taking the next 4 weeks to reflect on my wedding vows and recommit to my husband. I can’t wait to hear from you, to hear about the way the scripture worked on your heart, to hear about those powerful moments in our own marriage and to hear about the discussions you had with with husbands on the topics we will be working through. I can’t wait.
The study will only be available until the 23rd of this month.
Now is the time to tend to our marriage.
Thanks for being here,