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| August 28, 2010 |
Today is my two year anniversary, and although two years is not a very long time, I believe that these two years have been the most formative of my life. Two years and a day ago my most significant title was "teacher", a profession which I loved. But since then I have acquired two more titles, "wife" and "mother", words that don't define what I do, but what I am, and the vocation I have excepted for the rest of my life.
Last night my husband and I stayed up way too late talking, about lots of things, and we briefly discussed this little blog. He has always been wonderfully supportive, and a faithful reader, but he never misses an opportunity to challenge me (oh joy). He told me he was a little disappointed that I share so little on the blog and instead just post projects and pictures. He likes the posts on these topics, and I do too, but he's right, I didn't start this blog solely as a crafting blog. I seriously wanted to write about, and connect with others on, the issues and truths of Christian Motherhood. So, both because it is my anniversary and because I can still hear the truth in my husband's words, I am taking a step towards sharing today.
Yesterday at mass the second reading was the second reading from my wedding mass: Ephesians 5:21-32, a passage that includes that dreaded phrase: "Wives should be subordinate to their husband as to the Lord." I know that this isn't a very popular phrase, but as I get further into this marriage it rings with truth...but a much different truth than the single version of myself heard. This phrase is so important for me to hear because I was single until I was nearly 30, and I got pretty used to doing things by myself, my way, in my time. In many ways the Lord had to break my will in order for this marriage to work, and he continues to work on me. I pray everyday for a more charitable heart, and although I have a ways to go, I am amazed at the grace the Lord has sent in just two years.
But, the real truth is that this little phrase about wives can not be understood without reading on and looking at what St. Paul has to say about husbands, which I think is even more challenging: "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the Church, and handed himself over for her to sanctify her." And we all know how Christ handed himself over--his crucifixion. This is the powerful connection so vital to a healthy marriage: if a wife can accept that her husband is the head of the family and cheerfully subordinate herself to him, he, in turn, will gladly sacrifice for her due to the love he has for her. All of the sacrifice is not placed on the woman's plate. Marriage is sacrifice.
Thankfully we know that after the sacrifice came the resurrection.
I'm not coming up with anything new here, just sorting through one of the things 2 years of marriage has taught me. It is a difficult lesson, one I relearn during every disagreement, but one I know is true. Thanks for reading along, and I'd love to hear from you on this topic or on lessons you've learned in your marriage.
Nancy
Exchanging our vow
PS--I should give credit to my amazing wedding photographer, my dear cousin Bridget. Check out
her blog.
PPS--Today I am a quest posting over at Happy Hour Projects. I'd love it if you'd pop over and check it out!